It’s been soooooo long since I posted that I half thought I was going to give up. My summer was so filled with super holidays and craziness that I didn’t have time to even think about blogging.
But here I am, back at uni, final year and freaking the hell out. And as I lay in bed last night in physical pain wondering who would possibly understand what this felt like, I thought why not write about my anxiety on my blog. Maybe one of you might read it. Hell maybe you even might relate. Who knows.
So yeah. I have anxiety. I’m not properly diagnosed or anything but i’ve been struggling for the past couple of years and toying with the idea of doing something about it.
I am a full on worrier. I worry about things most normal people wouldn’t think twice about. And i let it build up until it seems huge, and I can’t see a way out.
The main thing for me is the physical pain that anxiety causes, that most people don’t understand. When i’m panicky it hurts to breathe and move. My body tingles and my chest throbs, and I can hear my heart beat so loud and fast. And then I panic more obviously.
Half of me thinks I am going crazy. Full on nutter. The other half thinks I am a drama queen and need to chill the hell out.
Isn’t that everyone’s views on mental health though? No one seems to accept it as a part of life, something to deal with head on rather than shy away from?
Everyone has something that they freak out about. Mine just happens to be everything, haha!
But sometimes I wish I knew there was someone else out there, having the same chest pains and the same sleepless nights.
All I can do now is deal with it as best as I can. And light as many scented candles as humanly possible. And do as many yoga classes as my body can take.
Let me know if any of this is remotely relatable to you, or if you have any advice you can share.